APENY(Asking for her Hand in Marriage) she said "YES"

When something is Priceless, no price tag is placed on it.

I was told i was priceless very many years ago.

I didn't really know what that meant.

Last weekend 29th June 2019, my brother made a bold step, by bold i mean went to ask his girlfriends parents for her hand in marriage. 

Many cultures do different things and we had no idea what to do because this was not our culture, but since we are Luo(Acholi), we usually take over anything. Well we were guided.

My culture is amazing, if this was an Acholi ceremony, the my family would have entered the house walking on their knees and no one sits on the chairs, everyone sits on the mats set out for them on the floor. 

Because we care about humanity, we know how long a journey can be, the first thing we give is water to drink to quench our thirst isn't that hospitable? After giving you the water they ask you who you are and how they can help you.

when we arrived at the venue, we weren't given water but we were warmly welcomed and ushered into the sitting room with comfortable chairs, it was cozy in there until they asked us who we are and how they could help us.

I looked at my brother and wondered what he was thinking about, not sure whether he was supposed to talk or not, he was so humble, it is the first time i have seen my brother that humble like he never stole mangoes on his way to school.

My uncle did most of the talking since he was representing my parents, and of course he talked about how fabulous we are as Acholi people are but mostly about what an amazing family we are and the reason why we were there(To ask for their daughter's hand in marriage)

In Our culture, it takes a family or the whole clan to ask for someones daughters hand in marriage, it is not done like the modern times were the man goes on one knee, in Acholi the whole family or clan goes on both knees. In this case we weren't on our knees when we asked.

After my uncle's talk, they told us to put it all in writing, in the Acholi culture, a letter is written before you go and it is the same with this culture except we didn't know. 

We were given 20 minutes to get out of the house and go put out intentions in writing.

we were then ushered back into the house and they received the letter, read it and it is at that point that we were able to see "Our wife to be"

This is the point their guards were down and our confidence raised, we had "conquered".

It is at this time when they served us lunch and that service meant there has been a union created between the to families, that we were not strangers anymore but now related by the union of the two "children" adults who had decided to bring the two families together.

Her father gladly accepted my brother as his son and confirmed that by writing a letter to my family/clan sealing the agreement.

My brother is officially engaged traditionally.

Welcome to the Family Noella.

Our cultures are priceless and there are many things they do that are valuable to the wellbeing of everyone thus creating peace and unity.

Marriage was ordained by God, people have created different practices on how to conduct this institution, our cultures have got their own practices too which i enjoy.

I am not a big fun of white weddings so when i get a chance i would rather attend functions like "Apeny" than a white wedding proposal. It brings out the priceless elements of our cultures, the values and principles in traditions that our cultures hold dearly.

"Apeny" mean Asking thus "Asking for her hand in marriage" And She Said YES!

She is our Wife.

Morning Precious Moments

woke up to the sound of my brothers and sisters laughter, the morning happiness it has become a tradition at home that when we wake up all we do is have that lovely family time, talk and laugh, play and joke around before dad leaves for work and when he leaves we remain behind with mum and just laugh, play and joke around, calling each other names and rebuking each other, these are priceless times with my family the only time we do this again is when we all come back home from work or school.

We have grown so much now, we are no longer young but we still fight sibling rivalry but we see each other less now that we are working but when we do see each other that is in the morning or some evenings if we do not come in late.
they are times i can not trade for anything, the are priceless and nothing can but such time and joy when i am with my family laughing and playing.

It is not very often that my family gets together this way especially now that every one seems to have grown up and working well not all but most two girls in high school and two others in primary, three working now and still in university.

Family moments are precious and adorable, daily i pray for my family and that those morning precious moments shall for ever live within us.

So REAL

The God i know 
The God i have experienced 
The God i have communed with is the God i talk about. 
Not the God i hear about or i have been told about but the God i have a relationship with 
he is real and he exists. 
It does not make sense and does not have to make sense how he does what he does all i know is that he is REAL !!!

He is so real i can almost touch him.

i could trade anything just to be in his presence

he is True and his Grace is sufficient

His Grace Shines on me, There have been days i have walked away from him, he carried me, he became my eyes when i could not see.

in times of pain he carries me in his arms and dries my tears.

In times of joy he rejoices with me, he is always with me.

His presence shines on me and leaves me not wanting.

He fills me when i am empty

He is so real

He is God

He is Love

He is my Best friend

He is everything to me and i Trust in him.

Triumph and True, his word is True and His promises are True He is Faithful, He is my God.

MYSTREY

The Heart is a Mystrey we never know what is in the Heart, we never know what people keep in their hearts, we always want to know and we sometimes will never know, its a mystrey, no one knows, not even the owner of the heart knows what they sometimes feel, out of it there is love, hatred, happiness, sadness, pain and joy, all of this are in the heart it is truely a mystrey to me. A friend of mine One day told me, "Haryet, always follow your heart, your heart will never lie and do what your heart tells you" boy i took it and it is true, your heart will never lie, but if i myself do not even know what my heart is saying how then will i know the truth, its a mystrey, my heart is a mystrey but i have choosen to listen to her anyway, and the few times i have, or rather many i have know how true it has been and how true my heart has always been, i will follow what she says even when my mind does not understand, and right now, she knows the right direction but she is scared, and i will follow her anyway.
i have trained my heart to Love and they say "Love never fails"i have let her walk in love, i have let her take me where she wants me to go as long as it is in love. one of my favourite quotes it "you can close your eyes to the things you don't wanna see but you can not close your Heart to the things you don't wanna feel" it has worked for me and it has helped me open up, it has helped me be a better person, it is in my heart. At this point, am griped with fear, but my heart tells me it is going to be alright if i can let her rule, and let her be and let her lead me, she is up for a "wounderful friendshp" and am going to side with her, i never want to do what she does not want and have to regret all my life, how she works i have no idea all i know is when i do what she wants am at peace. there is one thing i say that has somethng in common with my heart. Father(GOD), he is a mystrey, the bible says he is love and when you recieve him you recieve Love, i guess i have that mystrey in my heart, Love, no body understands it and everybody wants it, everybody thinks it will all be smooth and they forget it can sometimes be rough, but the heart understands and it is still a mystrey to me how she understands all these, i choose to follow my heart i choose to follow the mystrey.Three things are beyond me, four i do not understand, The way of an eagle in the sky, the way of the snake on a rock, the way of a ship on the sea and the way of a man with a young woman.MYSTREY

AM LUO, Who are you?!?

On the last Day of the conference, we watched a documentary titled " the Gorvernance Gap" it forcused on northern Uganda, made me Proud again that i was an Acholi, Pround to be part of them, When you are born, you never choose who you want your parents to be and in the same way you never choose what tribe you want to belong to or which country you want to belong to, i am Ugandan i i was born in Uganda, i am proud to be coming from the tribe of Acholi, watching this documentary made me remember my grandparents and all the people in northern Uganda who suffered the war, made me both sad and Strong in a way that i can do something for my people, that i can restore the hope that they once lost can be restored, i prayed and asked father what can i do, how can i be of help to the people who speak my mother tongue to the people who are crying out there, they are afraid, they do not know what to do,they are hopeless and yet they still stand everyday and hope things will get better, some resort to alcohol to hide their fears and frustrations, some commit suicide and others run away from hoem, some join the army not becausethey want to but it it the last resort they do not know what to do or wehre to go they have lost their culture, their childhood and their youth, they have lost their gender identities in terms of providing for their families when it comes to the men and the women have lost their values due to being raped,they do not feel like they are part of Uganda, they feel neglected and rejected, they do not know their crime they cry out for forgiveness and do not know what wrong they have done, they are my people, they are Acholi People, they are Luo.
the life they once know is now gone, they gracefully danced in circles and lifted each other in praise, and now their songs are sad even as they dance in circles their songs now is about how many loved ones they have lost and how hopeless life is .Can i change the songs again, can i help them compose new songs of restoration and hope, can i help then still dance in circles and maintain the culture, can i help them in anyway, whether we like it or not we can not change the past but i am sure we can change the future, What can i do for the future Generation of my people in Northern Uganda, Kitgum district? what can i do Father Help me Help me God, its not my fault that i Am LUO.

The Child in Me

Been at a stage in my life where i just wanted to run away from me and be someone else, it was a time that i had never thought i would get to ever in my life. i guess we grow up, the child in me just wants to be young, i wish i had not grown i would not be feeling the way i feel, i would not be getting butterflies in my stomach when i meet this boy and i would not worry if he responded to my questions or not, the child in me loved to laugh and play, nothing serious, all that mattered was food and i know mum would always be there to give me food. I knew i would always have someone to talk to when all was not fine, not to talk about secret issues that i would not want other people to know but general issues that did not make sence to me.
The child in me still wants that, i hate that i have to see this boy and have my heart skip, i hate that he is not talking to me, i hate that i will have to explain and try to understand what i am feeling for him, the child in me never know she would ever get to this stage of life, and now that she has reached there, she needs to adjust, it is painful because she does not want to, it is painful because she has been rejected, because she did not know what to do with what she was feeling, she opened up her heart and she was rejected, how she cries and hopes things will be better , how she wishes all had worked out well with the boy she loved, how she wishes she had not grown up to feel this way.

Luckly for her she has a Father(GOD) Who cares for her, who lets her know there is time for everything, and this is the time for her to feel what she feels, the time is ripe for her to grow, she is becoming a woman, she is growing up and Father has promised to be with her all the way.She is A WOMAN, its a Transformation time.
I do not take for granted all the people that come into my life, some come and stay for moments while others come and stay for long, it does not matter the period they always make impact, and Yes he left no stone unturned, he made impact in my life he came in and went out he left the child in me grow, Father used him to let me know i am a woman and it is ok, and all is well, he wrapped me under his wings and let me know he is with me all the way through all the pain, i do not regret having the feeling because father says it is ok, now i understand when father says Love is as Strong as Death, i now understand when father sends me to talk to all my sisters who have gone through what i have gone through i now understand and am sure father let him come into my life so i can be able to do his work better.

I did not lose myself after this situation, i was hurt and had a part of my heart broken father is mending it and giving me strenght everyday to pass through this and he has never stopped letting me know how much he loves me and how valuable i am and how precious i am, letting me know and reminding me again that i am a princess and a Treasure more so that Charm is decieptive and beauty is fleeting but a woman who Fears the Lord will be praised.

I NEED ME BACK(Messed Up)

At this moment, i am in a mess, am not sure what is going on in my life and everything seems to be going to the wrong direction, i need guidance and direction.
this month has had me tossed up and down with emotional changes and this has kept me cracked. i need to get back to myself i need to find me again, i need to get back to who i am. i feel like a part of me has been taken and i do not know who has taken it and i want it back, i want me back, i need me back, it is the worst stage to be in and it is the worst i have been it, guess when change comes without you knowing you kind of loose yourself, i need me back, even as i write this am not really thinking right, two day ago i had allergy attacks and had to be rushed to hospital that night and at one point i though i was going to die, today i had to rush Justine(my cousin) to hospital after she has been hit by a car, this is terrible, i had to rush my sister Sarah to hospital the other day when she came back from school after having an accident adn she got a clot in her head, its crazy my life is crazy right now and i hate it.
one of my friends, my spiritual mum i s leaving the country soon, a friend left yesterday, and everyone around me does not seem to be fine at all, its all in a mess.Both in office and at work am confused, i have school and i can not read with all these things in my mind, i can not study and yet i need to study. i can not wait till i finish with school soon what a relief that will be i will celebrate i will be happy but for now i need to focus one thing at a time.
Am in pain, am grieving all these things scilently who am i supposed to tell? i don't know so i will write it here knowing someone will read and hopefully Pray for me.
I am Messed uP right now........................................:(